A serious relationship can provide you with lots of joy and happiness. However, if you and your partner have different perspectives on the future of your relationship, it can also be an unfortunate source of stress and tension.
While arguments and disagreements are certainly commonplace in relationships, at the end of the day, you should land on the same forward-moving page as your partner.
A stressor for many individuals in a relationship is their incompatibility about their relationship status. Do you feel like you’re being strung along by your partner? Have you been on and off for months or even years? Does your partner refuse to define the relationship? You deserve to receive the level of commitment that you want from a relationship; use the following tips to let your partner know you’re ready for more.
Prepare
If you know that you’re ready for a committed and serious relationship, you must first define exactly what that commitment means and looks like to you. For instance – do you want to ensure you’re dating exclusively and not seeing other people? Or are you wanting your relationship to head in the direction of marriage and children? Before you have a conversation with your partner, you have to be clear about your own intentions.
In order to be properly prepared for your conversation, you also need to find the right setting. Avoid bringing this up on a whim or in an environment filled with distractions. For instance, instead of having this discussion at a crowded restaurant; bring it up during a low-key dinner at home instead.
Speak Up
Communication is arguably one of the most vital components of every relationship. Nobody is a mind reader, so you can’t expect your partner to have a firm understanding of your wants and needs unless you explicitly state them. If you and your partner have yet to have this serious discussion, it’s probably time you do so. While it requires vulnerability and even some discomfort to engage in this conversation, you won’t be able to have your needs met otherwise.
Don’t feel guilty about broaching the subject or fearsome about how your partner will react. Simply state your feelings, the facts of your relationship, and determine whether or not you’re on the same page.
Be willing to compromise
After your conversation, the best case scenario is that your partner, too, is ready and willing to move into a serious relationship. Unfortunately, not all situations result in the best case scenario. If your partner is not ready for more commitment, you must decide how much you’re willing to “tolerate” so to speak. For instance, maybe you can come to the decision that you won’t date other people, but your partner may need more time before any family introductions.
If your conversation ends in the worst case scenario, and your partner is not willing to consider a serious relationship, it may be time to finally put an end to it. The termination of any relationship, regardless of the level of commitment, can be emotionally challenging. This is why it’s important to remember the internal decision you made during the “preparation” process. You deserve to have your needs met, and shouldn’t feel obligated to stick around hoping for the best.
Defining a relationship can come with many challenges and a lot of confusion. Learn more about my relationship counseling services or request an appointment so that you don’t have to navigate this journey alone.
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